When I decided to start my own counselling studio I wanted to narrow down my clientele to women alone.
Was I Biased because I am a woman?
Because I am a Feminist ?! — Not really!
I was mostly concerned about women! I remember back in school when we had to write articles on social issues, I chose to write about the journey of women through several ages. In college, I got this opportunity and yet again I wrote about the journey of women. It wasn’t just an article for me, it was a way to express my concern about the attitude of women and towards women in our Indian society.
During my academic years I conducted researches on several Psychological issues of women and adolescent girls such as, Abortion, Self-esteem, Self-identity, impulsiveness, aggression. I read a lot of studies and researches conducted on the issues of women. Each time, the studies showed thin transparent lines between helplessness, ambition, habit and judgement.
These issues appear stagnant, oblivious and quite ordinary. After a period of time, these issues are negatively accepted and just blend in the lifestyle of women as one more habit. Whether it is a working woman or a homemaker, the attitude doesn’t change.
“Power” is a very heavy five letter word. It ruthlessly reminds people of their weaknesses and their helplessness. Among the male world women are at times assumed powerless and weak. This attitude is changing with time and slowly. However, the sad part is that women on a very large scale tend to discriminate them in a way decimating their own gender.
How?! – women demean their own power and strengths. Going back in time, there have been numerous women who have fought for their rights. Claimed their power righteously. Today, we don’t have to do any of that. Yet, there are many who are unaware of who they are and what are they capable of.
Apart from various social issues that have filled many a pages and books, women undergo a lot of psychological issues. Most of these issues are dismissed and never properly addressed. Various studies show that women are more prone to psychological issues such as depression, trauma, stress, eating disorders, mood changes than men. Women tend to dismiss these symptoms in their lives. It does not matter if she is a home maker or a workaholic or both.
Menstruation, is physical and biological. It is the crucial part of a woman’s system. However even today women especially young girls are shy to talk about it. In some schools, reproductive system even though being a part of the syllabus is skipped. Menstruation is not just physical it is emotional. It needs to be explained and dealt with utmost sensitivity and maturity. There is a lack of both these attributes in various girls and women. Distortion in the knowledge and expression leads to confusion that escalates to stress.
Without any doubt women are strong and resilient. Despite the strength there comes a point of saturation. According to research women tend to become negligent and extremely insensitive during a period of trauma or crisis. Cultural factor plays a significant role in the mental and emotional status of women. In a country like India, the ratio of women discrimination and women liberation is not parallel. Emotional and mental health takes a back seat almost always.
Since eternity, women have been instructed to think, feel and behave in a certain way. In a ladylike and a dignified manner. If a woman goes the extra mile to change the norm she is labelled in the most cruel and offensive form. No matter how unfair, the society tends to push all their hot buttons. Even though times are changing and women are exceeding and excelling in many areas of their lives and careers, none of it is given on an easy platter. They have to really struggle to prove their worth.
If one wants to witness change one really needs to make an effort. It is easy to take self-pity and feel miserable about oneself. The difficult part is to accept that. Once acceptance is achieved changing is smooth.
As women, we need to embrace ourselves. Mess and all. We really need to unlearn repeated patterns taught since eternity and evolve. Make our own rules, break them, change them and claim the power. This is not feminism its more about self-identity and self-worth. While many of us are already journeying some of us need a push and some courage.
My venture, is to help those women who need a push, some guidance and clarity in the direction they are headed.